Lately you have been on my mind and I don’t know why. I replay the memories of the day that you disappeared. not only did you take your love away but the friendship that we shared. Till this day I wonder what I could have done differently in order for us to still be friends. before I loved you, you were such a dear friend to me and it is still painful to believe that we’re not friends anymore. you will always have that special place in my heart no matter how badly things ended. Right now at this very moment I’m wondering what you’re doing. I wonder how your life is and that I hope that you’re doing great. And if there’s anything good that came from this tragedy, it’s that I got to know a person so amazing like you and I was able to experience such great adventures and happiness with you. I was able to learn and witness the things that made you smile. I am glad that once upon a time I was one of those reasons. But for now I am just thankful to have someone like you to have impacted my life. i’ll always miss you and I’ll always love you.
Today more than yesterday and less than tomorrow.
|—||Rosemonde Gerard (via icanrelateto)|
My close friends and family have brought or will be bringing life into the world and I continue to just fall in love with these little lives, being thankful that I am able to witness such miracles grow into a unique personality that’s developed ever since they were in their mothers womb. how can I not love something some pure and innocent and beautiful. They give me hope and keep me joyous. they’re so many of them and I love them equally.
Over the past year, I’ve been observing carefully of what people allow love to do to them. People are not lying when they say love is a strong aspect. People change, get angry, they give up, they forget just because all they want is love. And then there is heartbreak. I’ve experienced it twice enough to understand the agonizing feeling. you can only get over a heartbreak when you are ready. Who is ever ready to move on from something like love? Believe it or not, time heals everything. and it took me years to get over my heartbreaks. I witness my friends and family’s heartbreaks and I can’t see how they can go through with it. It’s just a feeling that makes you think nothing else matters and that is false. I was once that way. And I honestly don’t care to feel that way again..
That being said..I’ve been single for over three years, a struggling student in college, and working a full time job. I get extremely and easily distracted from my studies. It’s so hard for me to keep focused on school so I do not need distractions. Aka love. I drive over the twin span tonight and I just realized the position I am in and how happy I am for one of my close friend’s new baby to arrive. Then I picture my future in two years when I’ll be done with school and work on my career. My little princess will be 9 by then and my new babies will be 2 and 4. I can’t wait to see how they’ve grown. Then i saw myself working for a year, a place to myself. No boyfriend, no children. I may look like I’m alone, but I’m never alone. I have my littles nephews and nieces surrounding me, reminding me what true love is and what it’s like to be able to fall in love all over again everytime I see them.
By all means, I’m okay right now for being single for so long and I’m pretty sure I’d be okay if I were single for the rest of my life. I just have a really sensitive state of mind and I honestly rather ignore to experience a lifetime of happiness with someone else when I can already experience the laughs of my young family members. They are all and everything I need.
I would be just fine not having a husband or my own children.
It’s not that I am not living life but that I appreciate what’s already here and I’m not going to search for something that I already have: love.
|—||Albert Einstein (via psych-facts)|